


Tell Me Why It’ll Be Good Again

by AtLeastWeWontBeLonelyInHell



Category: The Mentalist
Genre: Drama, F/M, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, re-post from 2013
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-16
Updated: 2013-11-16
Packaged: 2019-10-11 05:31:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 762
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17440871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AtLeastWeWontBeLonelyInHell/pseuds/AtLeastWeWontBeLonelyInHell
Summary: „Looks like I have to stay just a little longer, then.“





	Tell Me Why It’ll Be Good Again

**Author's Note:**

> And a BIG special thank you goes to the wonderful clairebare for beta reading!

**Tell Me Why It’ll Be Good Again**

**.**

**.**

_…but I’m gonna love you, you never have to ask I’m gonna love you…_

That’s what they are singing in a song on the radio while she’s on her way to a crime scene and she can’t stop hitting the buttons almost angrily to shut the damn thing up.

_Because, what the hell do they know?_

She has to fight the urge to cry, has to fight the urge to pull over and give in to her weakness. _(They’re running out of time)._

And there’s yet another dead body waiting. Another case.  _(Another distraction from the last few names left on Janes list)._

.

She’s standing in the kitchenette a few hours later, making herself a sandwich. And she’s mad- _(no wait erase that)-_  she’s  _fucking_  furious.

Maybe because it’s almost noon and she hasn’t even had a cup of coffee yet. Maybe it’s because she hasn’t really sleept in over a week. Or maybe it’s just because Jane pissed off a whole bunch of people at that crime scene this morning.

No, of course there’s nothing new about it. She should be used to it, right? And she is, really.

Maybe that’s the point.  _(Or maybe there isn’t one in the first place)._

She’s hungry and tired and the only thing she really wants right now is crying herself to sleep.

And it’s not like her, no it isn’t. She isn’t weak. She never was. She can’t. She won’t.  _(Even if she wants to be)._

She’s startled by a sharp pain, letting go of the knife and the bread almost immediately. Starring at the blood that’s welling up from a cut on her wrist.

Perfect, isn’t it?  _(Just perfect)._

She tries to remember where they used to keep the first aid kit, while she’s already looking for a clean dishtowel to stop the blood from dripping on the floor.

„What happend?“

His voice makes her jump in surprise and she has to fight the urge to scream. Of course he has to show up just now.  _(To witness she’s not even able to make herself a sandwich without him)._

To prove him right once again. _(Right)?_

„Lisbon?“

He’s rushing into the room, almost breaking his tea cup when he puts it aside on the kitchen counter.

She wants to tell him to stop being melodramatic and to leave her the fuck alone, but the words wont come out and so she just keeps looking for that damn first aid kit instead. ( _Realizing she made quite a mess on the kitchen floor anyway)._

She hears him calling for help in the direction of the bullpen and she just wishes he would stop playing the hero. Because she’s feeling stupid enough already.  _(And she doesn’t need a bunch of people gathering around her)._

But it’s not like he would ever listen to her and so she just keeps looking, suddenly not sure what she’s looking for in the first place. Tears burning in her eyes. (R _eady to fall)._

She’s feeling dizzy. Feeling sick.  _(Maybe a band-aid won’t do the trick she thinks)._

And then her knees give in and she’s falling, falling, falling…

.

When she opens her eyes again she finds herself lying on the couch in her office with Jane sitting by her side. _  
_

„Welcome back,“ he whispers softly, giving her a smile before helping her up into a sitting position slowly. Watching her with a worried look on his face.

He’s handing her a glass of water and she takes it thankfully. Wondering how she got in her office, wondering what happend in the first place.  _(She remembers when she gets a look at her bandaged wrist)._

_Oh…_

She’s watching him sit down beside her. Close enough for her to touch.  _(But too far gone to keep)._

She knows he’s going to leave her. Maybe not today, but soon. ( _Too soon either way)._ And there’s just nothing she can do about it.

„So you decided today would be a good day to show me you’re not going to survive without me, huh?“ he chuckles softly. And it’s meant to be a joke. It really is.  _(But it hits far too close to home)._

Because the truth is, he had her falling for him years ago. (She’s in love with him for almost a decade now).  _(And no one is going to live)._

They’re sitting there on the couch for quite a long time, before he takes her hand softly into his own, whispering. „Looks like I have to stay just a little longer, then.“

**.**

**.**


End file.
